


The First Wedded Night

by afteriwake



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-18
Updated: 2012-09-18
Packaged: 2017-11-14 12:20:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/515178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afteriwake/pseuds/afteriwake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was not your typical first night of wedded bliss, spending it with your wife in her prison cell.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The First Wedded Night

**Author's Note:**

> This was my entry for **who_reversebang** on Livejournal. The art that inspired it can be found [here](http://lomosnark.livejournal.com/16632.html).

It all began at Lake Silencio. Or rather, it ended there. His life did, his life as The Doctor, with companions and the like. And she was there, twice. In the suit and by the shore, River Song stood with him at that pivotal point in his long life. Stood by him in one instance, watched from afar in the other. Except he was supposed to die, and she wouldn’t let him. And then suddenly time was happening all at once, all the events in time crashing and roiling about like a huge bubbling mess in a cauldron, and she was front and center in all of it. Wouldn’t let him die. Said he was more important to her than time itself, then the very existence of the universe. And somehow he knew, he absolutely _knew_ , that in her world he very much was the most important thing to her, and if he had any hope of saving time and space he had to go along with what her heart desired.

When her parents (only one of whom actually knew she was a parent; the other, still slightly shell-shocked one, just did what he was told, good soldier that he was) said they consented and gladly gave, it just came down to the matter of the kiss. He had to make it a good one, better than the rubbish kiss two hundred years prior in Stormcage at the gate of her prison. He could kiss; he’d had to, before, in order to have a grandchild. Had to do more than kiss, but for some reason all the women he’d met who’d had any romantic interest in him just left him so flustered he made a fool of himself. But he couldn’t do that now. Had to be his best or she’d never continue long enough for time to reset and him to die.

He wasn’t dying, of course. That was what he’d told her when he whispered into her ear, for her to look him in the eyes and really _look_. The miniature him, the real him, was inside the Tesselecta and that was all that was needed for the trick to work. After all, he was known as a trickster. Like she herself had said a while before, usually when there was a wizard in a story it was him, and wizards had to be tricksters by trade. It was a survival requirement. And this was the ultimate trick, convincing the world he was dead and gone, burned on a barge on Lake Silencio. Oh, he knew eventually Amy and Rory would find out. River was Melody, after all, and Melody was their daughter and good daughters only kept the most important secrets. But sometimes they would share those secrets if it meant easing a mother’s pain.

When time had reset itself he knew what he had to do. He hadn’t quite sorted out in his brain how he wanted everything to work. He was married now, though, to the woman who killed him. Who would be sitting in prison for the crime that she had watched herself commit, the crime that she knew was done at her hand. River Song’s life was full of things like that, and now she could add “killing the man I love only not really killing him because he’s faking his death” to her long list of unusual occurrences in her life. But when he got to Stormcage she wasn’t there; there was only some bewildered guard wondering how a blue police box from England had suddenly materialized in front of her cell. It took some explaining and careful wording and finally a lie that he was the Doctor but a younger Doctor, come by to pay her a visit to get some information before he left. He had to wonder about the security of the prison if they were more questioning of why someone was breaking in and less questioning of why River was gone yet again.

And then she was back, popped onto the bed in army fatigues, not scant inches from him. He recognized them; they were what she had changed into after the black dress, after the incident with the Weeping Angels and Amy getting the Angel in her head and their first real experience with the cracks in the universe. She appeared to be a bit rosier cheeked, though, and she wasn’t in shackles, so he assumed she had come back and dashed off again.

“She just realized she’s your mother-in-law now,” she said with a slight chuckle. “It took two glasses of a very good red wine for her to accept it.” He felt shocked; he hadn’t even realized when he’d done the hand-fasting that he was now related to his two best friends. He had in-laws again. He had _family_ again. He was no longer alone. He turned to the woman he had pledged himself to, and his goofy grin grew wider. “And it appears as though you’ve come to realize you’re not alone anymore, either.”

“No, I’m not,” he said, lacing his fingers behind his head and leaning back until his knuckles were flattened against the wall.

“I had to tell them. Amy, she was so heartbroken. So broken in general, really. I had to tell her, and then my father came home and we had to tell him as well. But they’ll keep your secret. They will, because they love you and…well, because you’re family now.”

“I suppose I shouldn’t call her Mum then,” he replied, turning his head slightly to look at her.

“Yes, she might swat you for that,” River replied. “And I don’t think Rory’s quite ready to be called anything other than Rory. Or perhaps The Lone Centurion, but only when it’s dealing with serious business. I think my father would very much like to simply be Rory Williams, husband to Amelia Pond, nurse at the local hospital, and leave certain parts of his life behind him.”

“I can see that he might,” he replied.

“My dearest mother, on the other hand…I think she still wants adventure. She wants to experience life headfirst, full on, but this time she’s wiser. And I think she can do it without you, now. Did you know she’s started her own perfume and that she’s the spokesmodel? It actually smells quite lovely, like rain clearing away the dust and leaving a sweet scent behind. Crisp and clean. I have a bottle that I smuggled in here.” She got off the bed and went to a shelf, and pulled out a bottle. “I doubt they’ll take it away from me. There are very few rules that apply to me here. I think that’s why the more seasoned guards send the new recruits here very rarely. Then I’d get away with even more things.”

He took the bottle from her and sprayed it into the air. He got the barest whiff of a scent and frowned. “I don’t smell anything.” She rolled her eyes and took the bottle back before spraying some on her wrist. She then rubbed her wrists together and held one out for him. He grasped it gently and brought it up to his nose and inhaled. “Petrichor,” he said quietly.

“Why yes, that is the name,” she replied, beginning to pull her wrist away. But he held firm, though not in a way that hurt her, and then he slid his hand down so their palms were touching and he grasped her hand. “Yes?”

“You must make me a promise,” he said quietly, looking at her intently.

“Anything, my love,” she replied, sitting on the bed next to him.

“Never endanger time and space again, not even for me. Never for me,” he said. “I know you showed me the universe at large does not agree with my own perception of myself, but…never for me. Never endanger any life for me, not even your own. Understood?”

She looked at him, and he could see thoughts warring inside her, things she wanted to say coming to the surface and stopping just short of coming out of her mouth. Finally he saw the confusion and bustle inside of her calm down. “Are you with me when I die?”

He blinked, and his mind flashed back to the library, to the previous regeneration of him, who met her when she knew all about him and he knew nothing of her, and her sacrifice. She was the one who talked of spoilers, but he knew if he did not answer this question he would not get her promise. “Yes.”

“Then you live on after me,” she said, a small sad smile on her face.

He hesitated. “You died the—“

She put a finger on his lips. “Spoilers,” she said, and her voice sounded thick. “I promise you, I will not endanger lives or time or space again, not for me, not for my family…not even for you, my love. Because now I know.” She blinked back tears, tears he could see threatening to leak at the corner of her eyes, and he felt no stronger impulse then to pull her close and hold her tight. He hadn’t meant to even imply that when he met her she would die. He hadn’t wanted her to know that on her last day he would not know who she was, but now she knew, through his own stupidity and guilt. All of this to get a promise, when he knew she most likely never would have interfered like that again because he was there at her end.

But before he could hold her she shut her eyes, took a few deep breaths, and when she opened then she had a warm smile on her face. He knew he had to look confused because she chuckled slightly when she removed her finger from his lips. “You are a very strange woman, River Song.”

“I am your very strange wife now,” she said, her smile widening. “And you’ll learn that I’m not really as strange as you seem to think I am. I mean, you seem to think all women are strange, to some extent. In many respects you’re a sheltered little boy and you get worse every time you regenerate.”

He sputtered. “I am not sheltered!”

“Tell me, if I were to change out of these clothes and stand in front of you stark naked, would you blush?” she asked sweetly, leaning in. He didn’t respond, but curse him, he felt warmth on his cheeks. “I’m in army fatigues and the mere _thought_ of me with not a scrap of clothing on makes you blush. It’s rather endearing…and something we’ll have to work on.” She stole a quick kiss and then got up. “You should run along soon, because I very much would like to change into something more comfortable. It’s been a long day.”

“But what about…us?” he asked.

“What _about_ us?” she asked back.

“We’re married! It may have been a long time but I distinctly remember you’re supposed to have a honeymoon when you get married.”

She smiled at him, and nodded. “We are. And I’m sure we’ll get around to it soon enough. But tonight I am tired, and I probably wouldn’t be much fun, and we can’t do what I’ve been dreaming of because…well, because you’re not ready yet. As I said earlier, we’ll need to work on some things first.”

“Could we at least talk for a while?” he asked.

She tilted her head slightly, and then began to unbutton her jacket. He averted his eyes and she laughed, a sparkling crystal clear sound, almost like bells tinkling, which ended as a throaty warm chuckle. “Oh, Doctor, I _am_ wearing a shirt underneath. And a bra, too, but I don’t expect you’ll see it any time soon.” 

His blush was bright on his cheeks as he turned to look at her. Watching her unbutton the jacket was enthralling. He didn’t think she was doing it in any way to tease him, to entice him. He had not watched her undress when she got into those fatigues in the first place, but he expected she did things like this with a grace that was captivating, and suddenly he was cursing this “sheltered boy” image she had of him. He watched her shrug out of the jacket and drape it across the back of her chair, and then pull her hair out of its entrapment. Golden curls cascaded across her shoulders, and she ran her fingers through them briefly before moving back to the bed and sitting next to him. “Well, then. Are you comfortable?”

“Not quite. Once I get out of these clothes and into what I usually wear to sleep it will be better. I doubt you’ve worn fatigues before. They’re a tad uncomfortable to sleep in, though they’ll do in a pinch or if you have nothing better to wear. Personally I much prefer sleeping in nothing at all.” She smiled. “Though I haven’t spent much time sleeping in the buff while I’ve been here. When I was Mels I did, in the privacy of my flat. Here? Not so much privacy, so it isn’t a feasible option.”

“Are you angry that I didn’t find you in time?” he asked, and he watched the smile dim. He hadn’t meant to turn the conversation to something serious, but he had to know. He had failed so many others, he had to know if he had failed her even though she professed to love him, because he was not sure she truly loved him or loved the story of him, the reputation of him.

“I was, before. Now…no, I’m not. I would not be the woman I am if I had had a normal childhood, and I’ve had many splendid adventures and met wonderful people. If I had had a normal childhood, or even if I had been raised on the TARDIS with my parents, I would not be who I am today. Part of what has happened since I’ve been here is soul searching. But I will admit that when I tried to kill you in Nazi Germany, I hated you. My mother had confided in the Mels me about her pregnancy, and the loss of the baby, and all the feelings she had pent up. I had known already…after all, I had searched them out so I could grow up alongside them, but hearing it from her, feeling her tears wet the clothing on my shoulder…I had never wanted to murder you more than I did at that point.”

“Then why did you save me?” he asked.

“Because…because it would have killed my mother to have been the one to kill you, and because I knew from her stories that you did great things, and the programming had started to slip. And I think, even before then, I had fallen in love with you. You are, after all, the greatest man I know, the only man I’ve loved. I almost destroyed the universe trying to avert my fate, after all,” she said, adding the last bit with a smile on her face.

“And you’ll never do that again,” he said.

“I promised you I wouldn’t. Would I lie to you?”

“You lie to others.”

“As do you, my love. Remember rule number one. But would I lie to _you_ about something like that?” And she looked at him intently, and almost as if her thoughts were laid open in her eyes he could read them, read her, and know the answer to that question.

“No, River, you would not lie to me about that.” He smiled at her then, and got a warm, wide, brilliant smile in return. He could become transfixed by that smile, easily and without hesitation. “You would lie to me about other things, though.”

“Perhaps. Perhaps not. We’ll only know when it comes time for the trials and tribulations all married couples go through.”

“Are you at all disappointed you didn’t get an elaborate wedding?”

She shook her head, then laid a hand on his cheek and caressed it. “I got what I wanted, with those I care most about there to see it.”

He shut his eyes and tilted his head towards her palm. “Next time you won’t get off so easily,” he said quietly. “I should have just grasped your hand, held tight and not married you.”

“But then you would have been utterly alone,” she said just as quietly. “This charade you have to pull off now, you’d have been able to tell no one. I don’t think you could have borne it. So you were selfish, and you got something you wouldn’t have been able to get any other way.” She moved closer without pulling her hand away, and put another hand on his chest, between his two hearts. “I will make you a promise, my love. I will show you that you made the right decision.”

His eyes flew open and he pulled away a bit, and he could see the clear expression of hurt cross her face before it settled into a mask of concentration, and he wanted to kick himself for doing it. He didn’t need to hurt her through stupid actions. He moved closer to her, until their knees were touching and they were facing each other. He took her hand, the one that had been on his face, and pressed it on his jacket over his left heart. She relaxed, and moved her hand from under his grasp to slip it under the jacket, with her hand over his shirt. He was immensely proud that he didn’t flinch, or turn, and the warmth from the palm of her hand felt comforting.

“Will you stay here until I go to sleep?” she asked.

“I thought you wanted to change into something more comfortable,” he said, his eyes widening.

“I can sleep in this for tonight,” she said. “But I would very much like to sleep next to my husband on my wedding night, at least for a while.”

“We both won’t fit on this bed,” he said.

She pulled her hand away, and he felt a curious sense of disappointment, then she stood up. “You move farther back, towards the corner.“ He did, and he stretched out slightly. Then she sat down next to him and leaned against him. He pushed hair out of the way and waited for her to get comfortable. He then wrapped an arm around her and held her close. “I do love you, you know. Not the idea of you… _you_ , the man I’ve gotten to know. Don’t ever doubt that.”

“I won’t.”

“I know someday you’ll tell me the same. And perhaps you’ll even tell me your name.” She yawned and snuggled closer. “For now, though, you’re here, and that’s enough.”

“We’ll start our honeymoon properly tomorrow. I’ll take you somewhere splendid.”

“No cruise ships flying among the stars, though. Mother told me how that particular honeymoon trip almost ended.”

He chuckled, and when he looked down at her face he saw contentment. That was a good sign. “Maybe I can take you there to see the flying shark.”

“Perhaps,” she said with another yawn. “Good night, my love, my husband.”

“Good night, River,” he said. He watched her as her breathing slowed, and he stayed even when he knew she was deep asleep. He would learn to love this maddening woman, this woman he had pledged himself to. And he knew that eventually she would break her promise, to not endanger things to save him, but for now, for some time, he had her, and he would grow to love her as much as he could before that fateful day in the library. It was what he wanted to do, now that he knew her better. It was what she deserved, his love, pure and whole, and he would give it to her with all his heart. It would just take time, and for now, time was something they had.


End file.
